Human

I am absolutely and confidently uninterested in an experientially, emotionally, relationally, or spiritually amputated life.

I have a very true desire to don the apron and curl my hair.

The honest version of myself would and does gain a huge amount of satisfaction from grinding wood and operating heavy machinery.

But do I make you uncomfortable with my Jim Carey impersonation or my questions about your past with sexual trauma?

I feel soothed and calmed, pulling on waders to advance into the depths of frothing rivers with my fly reel in hand.

Foot soaks at the nail salon also quiet my soul.

I’ll meet you in the mosh pit fervently dance,

Or in the room behind the stained glass windows and steeple,

And with my prayers

Be just as fervent.

I will never ask that I only receive invitations to weddings and baby showers

And none to funerals.

I will ride the waves, climb the mountains, and watch through my divers mask as the bubbles float over my head after I exhale with the help of my oxygen tank.

I will also spend many sunny days wrapped in a blanket inside my home with pen, paper, or brush in hand.

I am both a force to be reckoned with

As well as very much in need of a helping hand.

My temper is volcanic.

My vinyasa is graceful and ujjayi breath strong.

I desire the brush of my infants small fingers upon my lips

As well as the stinging shock of glacier water on my skin.

Can my breath be taken away by the sight of a sky painted in pastel

As well as the sight of a dead body?

We may find it difficult to understand such a complex creature - one who would seek to accomplish the completion of a 250 mile race as well as a pageant crown - and this difficulty gives rise to a need for names, order, and a solid structure to which we can assign a category.

Indeed, we do it to our own selves,

Pouring our beings into molds like water into an ice tray.

But you were not made to sit, frozen in fear of stepping outside of your assigned shape.

May I invite you, instead, to move

As water should

Flow where the river bed takes you

And enjoy the full potential of what it means to be human.